Storytime: Harry Potter and the 6th Grade Birthday Party, Part 1

Growing up, my best friend’s name was Jess. She was the funniest person I knew, my dad being the obvious exception. We met in pre-school, the very first day, when the two of us, sobbing and clinging to our mothers, found solace in both each other and the nearby sandbox. We both wanted the same … More Storytime: Harry Potter and the 6th Grade Birthday Party, Part 1

Adulthood Goal #4: Being a Streetwise Streetwalker

Okay, it’s not what you think. I am fully aware that a “street walker” is just a mean name for, you know, a lady of the night, or whatever. (“Lady of the night” is the nicest-sounding nickname I could think of for a profession that doesn’t really have a nice-sounding name.) I’ll explain what I … More Adulthood Goal #4: Being a Streetwise Streetwalker

Where The Hell I’ve Been Part 2: Guessing Games

I’m not really good at guessing things. Some people think it’s fun to stand around guessing what the weather will be like tomorrow, or how long [insert female celebrity] will be married to [insert male celebrity] before some disastrous event involving table-flipping and hair-pulling wretches them apart, resulting in a highly entertaining public spectacle. I’m … More Where The Hell I’ve Been Part 2: Guessing Games

WHOOPS.

WHOOPS. I mean, HELLO, my lovely invisible readers! I’M BACK! I know, I know. It’s been a while. Well, it’s been, like, two weeks or so. I apologize for the unexpected hiatus; school and life and everything became so hectic that I barely had time to brush my teeth, let alone dedicate an hour to … More WHOOPS.

In My Car

I sit in my car and I try not to die. I force air through my nose and count backwards from 10, eyes closed, slowly exhaling with each passing number. My house is alit with activity as I peel out of the driveway. Rain pelts against moving metal, and I can’t hear the radio. The … More In My Car